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I'm tired!

Updated: Apr 12, 2021

I wanted to write about something different today. However, something has truly upset me to the point of crying at work today!

My mom passed on November 20, 2018. I am coming up on my third Mother's Day without her, but that's not what upset me.

I am at work. I got a message from someone: "Wow ! You see your brother live on FB? Talking about he living under a bridge cursing his family out, and he goes on and on."

At first, I didn't see the video. So, I thought he'd deleted it. I looked further and...I won't go into too many details, but to see my two yougest siblings had a spat and my brother calling our sister out of her name and saying he's done with her...nah, that didn't sit right with me!

Mom has been gone a little over two years! We should be closer! At one point I was upset with my siblings because I didn't feel they did enough to ensure Mom lived longer.

I eventually healed and set up a family group in Messenger in hopes of us becoming closer. I also set up a group video call, and although none of my brothers showed up, those who did laughed and truly enjoyed. It felt great! That was in January! We haven't done it since.

I am sad...truly sad! Other than my oldest brother, I only hear from my siblings when they need me. It's never to ask how I am doing. Yet, I still try. I still try because Mom taught us to cherish our family. I try because I feel I am the glue that will hold the family together.

I'm strong, but I'm tired!!!

Today was a sad day! I know Mom's turning over in her grave watching our family fall apart! I am heartbroken!

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